i Am Nothing. HE is EVERYTHING.

For my personal devotions i've recently been reading the book of Ezra. Although i'm certain i've read the book before, never have i allowed God to speak to me through its pages. It's easy for me to forget the admonition of Paul in 2Tim. 3:16 when he says that ALL Scripture is inspired (literally, breathed out) by God.
Within Ezra, i've been able to see God at work fulfilling the promises He made to Israel's forefathers that the nation would always exist and that He would always preserve a remnant to return to the land.
What God especially showed me this past week is that HE changes the heart, NOT me. Ezra recounts the exciting ways in which God uses Persia to restore and rebuild the nation of Israel but then relates how Israel had turned from God and broke His law by marrying the people of the land. Even some of the Levites (priests) had taken wives from among the surrounding unbelieving nations and broken the very law of God they had been entrusted with upholding and maintaining.
What follows is Ezra's brokenness for what the people have done. He weeps and tears his garnment in a vivid display of his deep seated contrition over the sin of his people. Certainly, this type of penitance is very moving and in a sense admirable. Would to God i had such a perspective of sin. Yet the thing that God impressed upon me was not his display of grief and distress, it was his prayer that followed.
His godly sorrow led him to an emotional outburst, but Ezra's prayer led to national revival. Ezra says absolutely nothing to the people following their admission of guilt in breaking God's law. He passionately and desperately cries out to His God and God moves the hearts of the people to respond and to repent.
i often fall susceptible to the self-deceiving notion that ministry depends upon me. i think that somehow i've got to say the right thing or come up with a clever anecdote or show some kind of video clip in order to connect with those whom God has entrusted to me. Yet here i see one man on his face crying out to God on behalf of the people and THAT is what makes the difference.
Were i in Ezra's shoes, i would have undoubtedly been relying on my intellect to recall different passages of Scripture that might deal with repentance. i would make certain that i used multiple verses to create a compelling arguement and then cunningly try to wrap everything in a nice, neat, logical package so that God would use what i had proclaimed to change the hearts of the wayward.
Though certainly somewhere in the process prayer would have been cursory, it would not have been primary and that is where i fall so short. i depend upon the abilities and gifts God has given me instead of depending upon the God Who enables and gifts people for service. Planning, though important, is not what moves hearts--God does when we depend upon Him. It's only when i remember and practice that i am nothing and that HE is EVERYTHING that God can take this imperfect vessel and use it for something great. Otherwise, it's my glory and not God's.
What about you? Are you guilty of neglecting God and relying upon yourself? How much and how earnestly do you pray? Remember, we are nothing, but HE is EVERYTHING. Thanks for reading.

Obey or Wander

It's been several months since my last post. i attribute that to a touch of burnout. It seems that i've had so much going on in my life that i have nothing left to give. i'm certain you've all been there before. Yet God is blazing this mantra upon my soul so deeply that i feel that i must share it.
Kevin is preaching a series right now through the book of Joshua entitled "A Brand New Focus". i've heard several sermons on Joshua. In fact, i just listened to our chapel speaker speak out of the book of Joshua yet again. However, this past Sunday was different. This time God is speaking directly to me. His precision blade is cutting deep into my soul to expose its thoughts and intentions. He is warning me lovingly with His gentle whispering voice, "Obey or wander."
This message is changing the very core of who i am. Just as Israel had the opportunity to enter the land of promise, I also have the opportunity to enter into the tremendous plans God has for this life He's redeemed. Here it is that the adage rings ever so clear and so true, "Those who fail to learn from the past will be doomed to repeat it." Will i obey and enter in, or will i reject God's Word and be forced to wander?
How many are the wilderness experiences i've had in my lifetime: times that God wanted to take me into something great but was unable to because of my disobedience? This seems to be a direct correlation to Christ's hometown in Matthew 13:58 which says, "And He did not do many miracles there because of their lack of faith." How many steps have I wandered in the wilderness because I refused to trust God by following Him? As Hebrews 3:19 explains, "So we see that they were not able to enter, because of their unbelief."
The danger of wandering, as seen in the example of Israel, is that we can drop dead in the wilderness. We can continue so long that God simply leaves us there to waste away and waste our opportunity for something great. This is the vivid reality God is impressing upon my life at this point in the journey.
Each time this week that i've found myself in a situation where i have the choice to sin, the Spirit impresses upon my soul, "Obey or wander." What about you? Are you at a critical juncture in your life where God's wanting to do something spectacular but you're struggling with unbelief? God may be calling out to you today, "Obey or wander." Thanks for reading.